The Double Whammy Begins in Childhood

Emotional Sobriety: Friends & Lovers

 I remember how long it took me to wrap my head around the fact that I had self-hatred. I kept rationalizing that I thought of myself as a good person. I didn’t accept it until I read the ACA Red Book about my hatred coming from not being able to heal my family of origin while I was a child. Even though I came to recovery 5 years before my dad quit drinking, I was still carrying around those original feelings of worthlessness. I guess I had quite a Messiah complex.

These deep-rooted faulty self-concepts kept me looking for people to “save” for almost 70 years. Talk about a slow learner and a hard head. I believe these self concepts added to my depressive personality from my childhood. If you carry the weight of the family on your shoulders, it is hard to lighten up and let life flow. Responsibility…

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